"She said no, but her body was honest." Is that really true?
Just because her body is responding, does that means they want sex?
Table of Contents
Does your girlfriend really want to have sex?
Guys! I'm going to explain why wet doesn't mean she wants to have sex.
First of all, female wetness is a phenomenon in which the vestibular gland and Y-channel secrete bodily fluids after sexual excitement, a physiological response of the body after receiving sexual stimulation.
In a letter from one of my readers, he and his girlfriend were sleeping in the same bed. They are in love, ear to ear, mouth to mouth...stimulated her body and appeared wet sexual response.
The simplest way to understand this is that when you see a piece of cake, you may secrete saliva, but that doesn't mean you really want to eat the cake.
But it's hard for men to understand this about women. Because some scientists have done experiments and concluded that when men have an erection, they are more intense want sex, while women are not.
The results of showing women sexy photos
Canadian sexologist Meredith Chivers did an experiment - showing women different sexy photos. Some of these photos were sexy fitness photos of men/women, some were of heterosexual/homosexual sex, and some were of male and female monkeys mating.
Meredith used an instrument to measure blood flow to the women’s vaginal walls as a way to detect objective physiological responses in women, and he found that each photo initiated a response in women, including monkeys.
Yes, looking at monkeys also has a response. But scientists Meredith also counted women's subjective responses to "which photo made you sexually aroused". Most of women voted for heterosexual sex photos, followed by homosexual sex, followed by hot fitness photos, and no one voted for primate sex photos.
Obviously some of them are wet! How can this be explained?
Meredith did another 132 groups of experiments to test the connection between the psychological and physical desire of men and women respectively.
The results showed that men's objective arousal is strongly correlated, meaning that if a man has an erection, you can fairly guess what he's thinking about.
This is not the case for girls, whose objective arousal is weakly correlated.
Both men and women, the most important sexual organ involved in sexual activity is the brain. Wetness and wanting to have sex are actually two different feelings.
Although the result for men is a strong correlation, this does not mean that men must want to penetrate after they have an erection.
The sexual response stimulates an area of our brain called the "reward system", which contains three separate but interrelated systems that influence our desires and actual responses.
The first system is "liking," controlled by opiate-like neurotransmitters, which assesses how pleasurable things feel, i.e., do I like this feeling? Do I hate this feeling?
The second system is "wanting", controlled by dopamine, which motivates us to act further if we like it, and to stop acting if we hate it.
The third system is "learning", taking the famous experiment "Pavlov's dog" as an example, Pavlov made the association between bells and food, so the dog drooled every time it heard the sound of bells, because it learned that bells = food.
Therefore, in sexual arousal, stimulation of the genitalia can produce a physiological response, but it may not be fully correlated with the subjective experiences of "like" and "want sex" in the brain system, and the correlation is in the range of 10%-50%.
So, whether it's a man or a woman, having a sexual response doesn't always mean "wanting sex". Men may be more direct, but women may need more security or emotion, etc., to make them more willing to integrate.
A woman's wetness doesn't mean she wants it, the degree of wetness is related to the state of the body and can't be equated to the intensity of desire in a straightforward way.
Men and women have differences in biological structure and gender culture. Only when we deeply understand this difference, respect each other and seek common ground while reserving differences, human can move forward hand in hand.
We encourage women to express their wishes directly in a relationship, no means no, yes means yes. Only in this way, is the fastest way to let each other understand her ideas.
On the other hand, as partners, we also need to listen to each other, respect your lover's feelings, rather than through your own speculation and experience to judge whether they want to make love or not.
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"If there is a sea between you and her, all you need to do is to understand the existence of this sea, and then seek common. Slowly, the sea becomes a lake, the lake becomes a pond, the pond becomes a bathtub, and finally all you have to do is to take a bath together. "